Date: Friday 13, October 2023
Venue: earl
Report by: Ryan Astle
VIDEO: WATCH here
Photos: View here
The AIM
One of the aims of BetterMan is to help men improve the important relationships in their life. Our first event Quiz and Some Other Shizz was all about connecting and having fun with your mates.
BetterHalf, our second event, was “The ultimate date night” (our words, not theirs* 😂) aimed at celebrating the special relationship with your significant other.
* Although we did get some amazing feedback. Testimonials below.
With eight kids under the age of 10 between us - Ged, Todd and I know how difficult it is to get out for date nights.
With our wives that is...
Anyway, we wanted to do something special for them and thought others might be of the same mindset for their partners. Thankfully we were right and we sold out the capacity 35 tables at the fantastic Earl restaurant.
The Homework
We prefaced ticket sales by saying that the men would be sent some homework. Thankfully that didn't scare everybody off.
So, two weeks prior we sent the men an email with a homework assignment and told the men to keep it a secret from their better halves:
The Venue
We were very fortunate to secure a booking for the whole of Earl restaurant. I managed to snaffle the red carpet from work (long story as to why we have it, but what I will say is that I got some strange looks walking into the Dux for a pint beforehand with a red carpet under my arm...), and we set it up in the restaurant entrance so couples could get a photo of them looking swanky before their meal. I have to say Tom and the team at Earl were fantastic, and the food exquisite so highly recommend you check it out.
The band
Words don't do justice to how amazing the band - The Porter Duo were. We're hoping to release a video of the night in the coming week, so you'll be able to hear for yourself.
Husband and wife duo Hine and Hemi Porter were the perfect addition, their songs the ideal background for an intimate evening.
Earlier in the week we'd flicked through the song BetterMan by George Ogilvie to see if they could cover it. Hemi replied saying they'd give it a go, and I have to say, Hemi smashed it out of the park, the audience in complete silence and awe listening to his moving rendition.
THE women's refuge
Our chosen charity to donate to for the BetterHalf event was The Women's Refuge. We raised funds by letting people request songs for $10 per song. This raised $200. The Porter Duo donated $70 of their fee (legends!) and we auctioned off a night for two including breakfast that was kindly donated by The George with the winning bid raising $500! So all in all, $770 to a great cause.
The homework continued...
The feedback from the better halves was that the men nailed their homework, there were a lot of A+ marks being dished out around the room. Well done men for being open, honest, and vulnerable to help foster a deeper connection with your partners.
We also created prompt cards for each table with a number of questions like "How would you like to be a better person?" and "What insecurities have held you back?" that by all accounts were a hit and drummed up some deep and meaningful conversations.
The food
I'm salivating just thinking about it again. 5 out of 5 stars for me. I'll let this picture paint a thousand words rather than saying anymore...
Competition
In case you haven't read about BetterMan you might not know that the cornerstone principles of our events are BYC - that's Betterment, Yarns and Competition. We felt that our homework and prompt cards had ticked off the first two of those three things, so we wanted to have a bit of light-hearted competition.
You may have seen or experienced the shoe game at weddings. We just thought we'd try it with 35 couples rather than one. What could go wrong...
The premise of the game is to give you a chance to test your relationship understanding of one another. I'd ask a question and if the answer was yourself, then you'd hold up your own shoe. If your answer was your partner, then you'd hold up their shoe.
Typically you play this back to back, but given the space constraints we decided that everyone had to close their eyes and raise the shoes instead.
After five rounds of softballs to get couples into the swing of things, we started eliminating couples if they didn't have the same answers. The "Who gets along better with the other's family?" question knocked quite a few couples out.
We eventually got it down to one winning couple who scored themselves a $200 voucher courtesy of the good sorts at Earl.
The result
Ged, Todd, and I and our respective partners Shaanti, Rachel, and Nicola all had a great time and feel our relationships are stronger because of the experience, so on a personal note I think the night was a success. The genuine, heartfelt responses we received on the night, and post the event, were special to hear and definitely made the hard work worthwhile.
Testimonials
Since the event we've had some amazing feedback including:
Scott Willoughby
"BetterMan, what better cause, not only are they aiming to improve men's mental health, they are aiming to improve the lives of those around them. BetterHalf was a wholesome evening that everyone needs to experience. Expressing feelings and getting ‘extra’ stuff out on the table definitely helps to expand and deepen a relationship."
Teri Tinirau
Rob Dixon
Jono Collins
Simone Johnstone
April Hastilow
Thank Yous
A huge thanks to Moffat's Flower Company for donating a gerbera for each of the tables that could be taken home after the event alongside a lipstick or mascara gift from Indigo and Iris (a local beauty brand that donate 50% of their profits to different impact projects). Thanks to The George Hotel, Earl, Two Dudes (a local skin care company that donate 10% of profits to men's health) for giving us some prizes, The Porter Duo, Izaac from The Creator for taking photos and videos, and the Ministry of Social Development for their help and advice including the details for these support options that we had printed out on the night and now have online for anyone that needs further help or support.
Cheers,
The BetterMan team (Ryan, Ged and Todd)
p.s. Check out the BetterHalf video and BetterHalf photos and be sure to Subscribe to our BetterMan updates and follow our socials: BetterMan Facebook and BetterMan Instagram.
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